His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
We left an ass print on the piano.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
