If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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