I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
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