ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
