I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
