theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
