now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
