I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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