At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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