He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
