then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
