Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
I just had sex with a black guy. He told me I had a big dick. I think that's God's way of saying it's okay to be gay.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
