Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
