This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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