did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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