Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
You are a genius and a whore.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
