The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
