i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Randomize
