i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
