girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
The cops high fived after they tackled you
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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