He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
If we see one freshman that cummed on me, we are leaving.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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