K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize
