He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
it's not cheating when I paid for it
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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