it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
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