I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
So squirting runs in the family.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Randomize
