she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
