I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
last night I used snow as a chaser
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
