I saw his package. It spoke to me.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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