Sry I called you an 8
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Randomize
