He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
