if i can run in heels then i can drive
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
