Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
