Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
