We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
