but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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