dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
I was wrong being drunk doesn't make accounting more interesting
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
