do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
tell your sister to shave her snatch
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
