My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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