omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
