I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
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