Duck Duck Cougar?
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
