Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Randomize
