I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
