I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
