Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Randomize
