I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
