i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
wow bdsm is so cute
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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