I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
