So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
