Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize
