I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize
